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Sunday, February 14, 2010

117) Tumors; Joel (Joeb?) & his Tractor

I am so happy to be able to write another adventure to share with everyone! It has been a long time without any cohesive memories that I could write and share so I’m pleased to say that I believe I had another OBE retrieval early this morning!

The night started much as usual, but I went to my ‘traveling couch’ earlier than usual (2am) due to being awake and unable to sleep right away. I initially had many different ‘dream clips’ and each time waking and wondering what they could mean. There were some related to my work, a few felt as if I was really OOB and in one I can remember different children running around my house making noise.

Another one in particular was rather intriguing in that I had just finished ‘helping’ this disabled child, and he told me I had ‘tumors in my belly’. At that time I recall having felt ‘lumps’ in my lower abdomen, and asked the child where they were. He pointed to his lower abdomen, and said ‘it’s not big deal, they just need to come out’. Immediately my medical background kicks in and I’m trying to seal in my memory that I may need a test to look for these in the future.

One other ‘dream’ was different in that I met with a man and woman who were telling me of their ‘loss’ of a young son, Joel (Joeb? Two part Jo- name). They told me he died at a young age “many, many years ago” after falling off a wagon being pulled by a tractor. He loved tractors, and I had a sense of ‘farming’ when talking to this couple.

I made no sense of this until I had this OBE a short time later. I remember ‘waking’ on the couch, and feeling disappointed that I once again was awake without having had an OOBE. I rolled off the couch, and found myself completely tangled in the blankets sitting on the floor! Trying to get untangled, I looked toward the TV in my living room and noticed light shadows, as if someone was blocking the light coming in from the front door down the hallway. (Had I realized it, this living room was the way it appeared a few years ago before we had it remodeled. That should have been a signal for me too!)

Thinking the front door was accidently left open (and not realizing there shouldn’t be light outside yet!), I moved down the hallway and was shocked to see my young son about age 5 coming in from outdoors!! I realized immediately that I had to be OOB, as my son is a young man of 25 right now, yet here he was as a child!

I was thrilled to think I was finally OOB again, and my young son escorted me outdoors to the front porch. I began floating upward slightly and everything went black for a few seconds, but then I floated back down to the front porch and my vision returned. This floating just confirmed to me that I was indeed OOB.

Here, the scenery changed as my usual front yard was now covered with a brick/stone walkway that weaved in and out of masses of wildflowers – yellow, orange, white ones – and I took note that the flowers were beautiful, yet the ‘feel’ of the flowers was ‘unkempt’ or ‘wild’, as if not looked after.

There were children playing and running around, also with the ‘unkempt’ or ‘wild’ feel, as if not cared for. They were happy, but in a ‘wild’ sort of way. It’s hard to describe, but almost as if they were ‘not good’ children, or bullies. I saw adults there too, one mentally challenged man was off to my left, quiet and non-communicative, and there were two female ‘caretakers’ off to my right who were happy to see me.

We walked together and talked, but memories elude me as to what the discussion was about once I woke fully at the end. I remember the landscape simulated the land around my house and at one point, I felt drawn to a young child standing quietly and forlornly by the side of the road, as if he was sad and withdrawn.

The feeling was that this child was being ‘bullied’ by the other children and did not even try to reach out to anyone. In hindsight, I’m think he was not able to ‘see’ the adults who were there with me trying to help him, hence his forlorn appearance and resignation to a life of being teased and bullied by the other children.

He saw me and allowed me to pick him up, giving him hugs and talking with him. He remained non-communicative, and the adults with me told me his name was ‘Joel’ (Joab?!) the same name I heard just a dream or two ago!! I immediately recognized that name, and asked what his story was.

The adults told me he had ‘passed over’ quickly as a young child after falling off a wagon! I knew immediately that this was the same ‘lost’ child the parents were looking for!

Walking back toward my house, I found myself inside a room with two other adults (they appeared to be MY parents, but I think the connection was that these were caretakers of the children). They told Joel that they were ‘going out’ that I was to ‘babysit’ for a bit, and to listen to what I said. I had the feeling Joel had memories of what babysitters did, and this is how they got him to pay attention to me.

I immediately went into ‘babysitter’ mode – which is always trying to find something that I know the child would relate to and have fun with. In searching the room, I found shelves with small toy objects, and my eyes were thrilled to see that way up high on a shelf was a small wagon!! I took it down and showed Joel, who lit up with a smile.

I then searched more and found a tractor wheel on a chicken? object so I took it down. I attached it to the wagon, and Joel was now beaming! Somehow, the object changed into a toy tractor that Joel was able to sit into and drive. I pushed other toy objects out of the way so he could ‘drive’ and it appeared he was now completely enthralled with the idea he was in control. At that point the OBE ended!!!

I can only imagine that he was now able to ‘see’ those who were there to help him, or perhaps even help himself by feeling more ‘in control’ so that he could go back with his parents who were looking for him.

Recording this OBE was difficult, as I remember thinking I was recording it two or three times, only to realize that I still was not fully awake and using the ‘real’ recorder! I went over the experience many times, trying to ‘seal it’ in my memory, only to realize I wasn’t awake and recording! When I did ‘pull myself’ up to full wakefulness, the memories faded SO quickly! I just feel so disappointed that it all seemed so easy to remember, until I became fully conscious!

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